insert emo title here and/or the state of the knicks

"we'll give you curry and frye for iverson... "

dolan/isiah's imminent off-season indecent proposal.

so francis made is knick debut last night. zzzzzz... talk about redundant! francis logged 33 minutes. shot 6-12 with 4 dimes and 5 rebs. the last 3 was made when dudes were walking off the court, so let's say his line was really 13/4/5. true it's his first game, but the minute you put on the knicks jersey you lose a step, age 5 years, and get richer. crawford played 13 minutes and went 0-3. nate was a DNP. this is bullshit.

francis will not magically turn into kevin garnett. we added another expensive piece at the 'expense' of another expensive piece, which is crawford. imagine if the heat traded wade for yao. or imagine if the lakers traded odom for ray allen. or if the suns traded marion for jason kidd.

the knicks getting francis for a contract isn't as harsh as those scenarios, but the redundancy is is so obvious! crawford gets 13 mintues!? uhh... isn't crawford making tons of money too? and aren't his stats per minute comparable to francis'? and nate's a folk hero in the making! dolon! want fans in the seats? how bout putting the reigning slam dunk champ on the floor! douche!

we'll see what happens when the season's over but i mean, this team looks listless. no life. we need our rooks on the court, not disgruntled guards who pine for ex-teammates and refuse to re-enter games. i'm pissed. 15 wins 39 losses, people.

casual record review feb 25 2006!

whoops i thought i had all 'the carter collection' material so i passed it up last week. uh, there's a lot of new wheezy here! reebok put some money into this so all the songs are mastered well, and sound fucking great! what can i say? fuckit what can i say i'm psyched on this CD. it's even got 'shooters'... the leno sesh! and more tender jams! 'do what you what you do'? 'boom bap'? so good! i think i already like this as much as his gangster grillz... is that weird?

southen smoke 24. yup! another good one! it starts off great with some fired-up jams. the usual cast: wayne, jeezy, three 6, paul wall, etc. the kryptonite remix is crazy too. sometimes these comps are a bit hectic for me, but i like all the southern smoke i have, which isn't much. i prefer the wayne but i could change my mind tomorrow. oui!

watch my moves 3. i bought this for cam's new jams. wet wipes is a little funny. i'm not a fan of sex songs but any cam is good cam pretty much. i guess it's kinda embarrassing for him that jay-z didn't respond to all that bullshit. sort of like kmart and tim thomas. this disc isn't as good as the other 2 but whatever. i'm not that mad. it's casual!

i'll make it wintatime

sanneh has been jamming hard this week. let's take a look to see how wrong/right he is.

first, 'you can't ban the snowman'

first line: "Young Jeezy's latest CD isn't a sequel to "Let's Get It: Thug Motivation 101", his mesmerizing album from last year."
last line: People "say I can't rap and they might be right," he announces, shrugging off the insult for the same reason he wears a diamond-encrusted snowman chain: because he can afford to."

ok the piece was shortl and this is basically half the review. yeah, basically i gather K is saying that this guy's LP was great, this tape is just good. some jokes. the review gets 3.5 mics. hey! it's short!

second, yesterday he wrote about 'destroyer's rubies'

first line: "Daniel Bejar is the Vancouver singer-songwriter who performs as Destroyer."
last line: "You can almost imagine Mr. Bejar shushing his characters ("Quiet, Ruby, someone's coming"), ushering them off the page and back into the songs."

this is one of k's better reviews. but i really don't know cause i skip all this martnia mcbride/papoose pieces. k is generally a dubious critic, but he has some jams. the review gets 5 mics.

report! toosh!

Ubl reviewed the battles re-issue today!

first line: "There are few bands I'm more willing to give the benefit of the doubt than Battles."
last line: "Surprise has so far been their only guarantee."

surprise? now, i've been a fan of ian williams for forever it seems. tyondai's solo stuff is great, i actually have the lynx stuff and i like 'strap it on' by helmet. an 8.0? hmm... i would say more like 7.2. c'mon with these guys' pedigrees i have to admit i was expecting more when these EP's came out. they're good, i will buy anything they do, and i will tell my friends to see them.

i think poitchfork is fine most of the time, but if destroyer just got a 8.5 a few days ago, and today battles gets a 8.0, i'd tell the writers over there to get some walkie talkies and confer about their ratings system. i have an idea: just review the record and fuck the number bullshit! the review gets a 5.6.

remembrances of things past

3PM passed and there it goes. we get stevie disenfranchised and that's it. it's pretty hilarious how many guards we're holding, how much money they make, and how none of them are true point guards! so the consensus around the league is that by draft time isiah will try to unload our late 1st round pick, either steph or francis, and frye for the big ticket. whatever at this point will it make a difference? sure KG would be sweet but i'd rather keep frye, and trade one of these guards for a starting big who isn't the best and most sought after player in the last 10 years. i'd take kenny thomas for crawford. sure! Q in a sign-and-trade for reggie evans? ok! stephon marbury in a sign-and-trade for al harrington? OUI! there's also rumors zeke is targeting jermaine o'neal, but that guy is just too injury prone to touch right now.

isiah's GM sensiblities i can relate to though. he pines for the past! he's always referring to his 'bad boys' and tries to re-create its frontcourt. he pines for his indiana past so he leaks it to the media that he's targeting o'neal and harrington. what's next? bill laimbeer as a head coach candidate? oh wait...

dude is just emo. reading belle and sebastian liner notes and thinking, 'wouldn't it be great if i could re-live those days where i didn't suck?' zeke! let go of your past! you can never go back!

i think salary caps have weird racial undertones, and i'm generally against them. but for the knicks' sake, we need one STAT! look what dolan/sather did with the rangers. people were asking for sather's head as he held onto big contract after big contract. lindros, holik, fleury, jagr, etc. what happens? the NHL goes on strike, comes back with a cap, sather ships his 'excess' pieces off to other teams, and the rangers are shredding! people are even talking cup! one year this took!

so during the next owners/players meetings i hope they figure out some sort of hard cap. just cause instead of the 10 years it will take the knicks to fix this current mess, it'll speed it up to where we'll see them in the finals before we die!

stevie wander

"This is a trade that we all feel makes us a better basketball team for both now and in the future," Thomas said in a news release announcing the deal. "In Steve, we add an All-Star caliber player to our team without giving up core assets that are key to our future."

"Acquiring a player of Steve's level and talent is very exciting for this team," Brown said. "In him, we have added a veteran that could help us in many areas, and assist with our young players' development."

ok so i've been bitching abvout this trade for weeks, but now that we got stevie without dealing crawford or lee or nate is kind of a coup. albeit everyone knows we should've let penny walk, but this is from an owner who shipped patrick ewing out for luc longley and glen rice! obviously dolan wants to spend, and whatever. let's try to make the best out of it.

francis and marbury will be weird, but at least they're both proven players, with a lot more to prove. i won't judge this trade til tomorrow when we find out which stiff we get for crawford or lee. joel pryzbilla? i don't think theo's coming here. thankfully. the list of free agents this summer is fucking impressive. chauncey [ain't going anywhere], bibby, vince, rashard, and 'the truth'. man if isiah could land PP that would be the funniest, most expensive team to miss the playoffs!

just look at the winning bid amount

for that stupid poster in a tube!

B is for brendan! A is for awesome!

so brendan played last night at cakeshop with first nation. now, i have a giant soft spot for BARR starting from the dogg and pony days. i'd watch brendan get booed onstage and confront people and it was rad. i can't say his jams are for everyone, but to me it's super inspiring. sure it's idyllic and weird sounding, but i love it cause it's idyllic and weird sounding! it just makes me pumped when he talks about 'community' and 'squadrons' what can i say. he's not the only one living in the 90's! i just have a lot of respect for everything he's done and is doing. i'm a fan!

"what you wanna make? think about it! make it now!"
"give the magazine out for free! make it with me!"
"you had a plan for your band and you didn't tell your band now you're out of the band"
"A is for always"

and first nation sung happy birthday for carol! happy birthday carol!

go see BARR and first nation on tour with animal collective. it'll be a weird, rad show!

oi vey!

matt lemay reviewed the new destroya today
first line: "Those of you who keep abreast of online rumor-mongering might be surprised to find that the rating at the top of this page is a few points shy of a 10.0."
last line: "Encapsulating and elevating the best of Destroyer's back catalog, Destroyer's Rubies serves as a potent reminder that the intelligence of Bejar's songs has never obfuscated their emotional weight."

sounds like lemay has great taste! i'll give this review an 8.5 too! awesome!

the hudson bell review from the same site
first line: "Hudson Bell is a singer/songwriter originally from Louisiana who now resides in San Francisco."
last line: "Closer "Sea Horse" utilizes quiet organ drones, lush guitar strumming, and soaring vocal harmonies to bring everything together, and, along with "Slow Burn", bookends a rich, delicate album."

unlike the well written destroyer review, this review is blah. very much like this band. they gave the album a 7.4, i give it a 5.6. the review gets a 4.0...

nate!

the toosh report! feb 16, 06

stosuy reviewed the new AIDS wolf record today. here we go!

first line: "The "buzzworthy" aspects of AIDS Wolf's The Lovvers LP are the basically pointless, peripheral details you've probably heard a couple of hundred times by now."
last line: "Maybe it's a joke? For now, let's just call it shit in wolf's clothing."

haha i agree! the review gets 4 mics!

you know... when you think about it, it's retarded!

ok let's say the rumors come true, and isiah sends crawford, lee, and penny to orlando for francis and battie or something [cato's gone aready]. let's look at crawford's numbers last year with lenny and herb. i'm taking last year's stats cause this year's situation with larry has hurt everyone's numbers... rotation wise, not performance wise. i'm taking francis' stats for this year thus far.

crawford: 17.7/4.3/2.9 with 1.2 steals and 2.6 threes a game. also, 2.1 turnovers.
stevie 'wonder': 16.4/5.7/4.8 with 1.1 steals and .4 threes a game. 3.4 turnovers.

my argument is this: you're giving up crawford, who's not as good as steve francis, but put into the right situation [if larry ever figures it out], he's not far off from francis. and when you account 3PTM and TO he's kind of right up there. the minute francis gets to NY larry will stick him in his doghouse and francis will huff and puff to the media that 'it's just no fun without cuttino'. and you throw in david lee, a great bench player [already!] and a juicy expiring contract and you start thinking... don't we already have a shoot-first point guard? do we have a small forward yet? do we have enough money to interest melo, bosh, wade, lebron, iggy, howard, josh smith, ben gordon, or any young player who would listen to the knicks if they had any cash flexibility? hmmm... better get that maxed-out shooting guard now!

marbury and francis would be fun to watch sure, but how is it that much different than marbury and crawford? fine dolan will make isiah deal penny. but francis? dolan! steve francis on the knicks will not bring us back to the garden for those $75 seats and $8 beers! show us some goddamn foresignt! cablevision is robbing knicks fans!

and we all know what isiah sees in francis that we don't: 'steve's a player that reminds me of myself.' ... uh, this is getting ridiculous!

guess which one of these 3 guys is vince

please don't say the baby

now, if it is true that the hawks are willing to move al harrington, i think isiah should go out and get him. obviously zeke thinks we can get it done with curry at the 5. fair enough. ok. so we still need a true 1 and 3. watson i like but kmart i'm worried about. i'd be happier with a delk/harrington scenario. whatever even lue/harrington.

i'm just a baby al fan what can i say. he's 6' 9", 26 years old, and gives you 18/7/3. he chips in with steals and 3's too. sure on a team like the knicks his average might dip, but he's playing with joe johnson and zaza right now. easily comparable to marbury and curry... i can't say i'm not worried about his knee as well, but what are you going to do.

let's see if the knicks can beat the worst team in the nba tonight. someone please guard felton and knight. please! watch jumaine go off for 4 3's tonight. no perimiter D from ny ever... larry what do you do at practice? and would i trade the entire bobcats roster for the knicks roster? in a fucking second!

bigupbigwillandwags.blogspot.com

you guys are bro-ish. much thanks for the great party last night. some dude in the crowd had to school me on the ways of the dancehall but there was no doubt: sham was fucking awesome! it was good times! hi-five!

please don't break my heart and have destroyer come to town and only rock one 'ron delsner' show. me and some guy named 'the schmizzle' will cry onto our 'rubies' promo discs... but i'm joking no worries! beggars can't be choosers! "quiet ruby someone's coming, approach with stealth... it's just the precious american underground!

haha ok whatever bring the 'franchise' on...

According to ESPN, the Knicks are making a strong push to land Steve Francis before the Feb. 23 deadline.
New York is hoping that the dangerous backcourt of Stephon Marbury and Francis could salvage their dreadful season. New York is offering Penny Hardaway, Jamal Crawford and either Trevor Ariza, David Lee or Nate Robinson in exchange for Francis and Kelvin Cato, whose $8.64 million salary comes off the cap at the end of the season. Minnsota and Denver are also interested in Stevie Franchise

will isiah pull the trigger

the rumors are picking up... all these dudes have been linked to a swap involving penny's contract and david lee. i'd be bummed to see lee go, but i won't lie... i'd be super-amped to see lamar brodom at the garden! this guy is can play all 5 positions! as everyone knows, isiah should really just let penny's contract expire, but since we know dolan won't let him, we might as well get a player. wouldn't mind watson, but f kmart. i just don't trust thise knees. and i'd rather have reggie evans than drew gooden. what would be the softest frontline in the game? how bout gooden, frye and curry? yup.

i declare a new boykins tradition

ok i'm gonna start reviewing reviews. i'm gonna call this new series 'TOOSH: CASUAL REVIEW REVIEWS'. first up? the life pursuit. why not? it's casual!

so pitchfork went ahead and hooked the album up with an 8.5. not bad! i think that might be high, but i won't argue. pitchfork reviews are long winded but i read most of it. btw who's gonna start the pitchfork cliff notes? damn these nerds can go on... then again so can i. anyway, the first sentence: "Every religion began as a cult.' and then the last sentence: 'The Life Pursuit is a baroque pop cathedral, welcoming the faithful and newly converted alike." Hogan's 'faith' angle to the review good, but really, all people do is look at the 8.5 and head to amazon to buy the thing.

in K's review he goes out of his way to dis nocito, which is crazy. we know who's wrong 99% of the time but to go and call him out like that? faced! ok first sentence: "Not long ago a query arrived, urgent and unexpected, via cellphone." last sentence: "It's a hopeful possibility, but a bittersweet one: maybe it's possible to love this band a little less, and a little longer." K stop watching 'the notebook' and pick up your balls.

i basically agree with both reviews. pitchfork gets a B+/B the times gets a A/A-