Wednesday, November 30, 2005

terrible. just... terrible





did you hear the 50 cent/g unit weekend on the radio? it was awful! i mean, seriously boring, slow [witted], and tired. and i don't really dislike anything 'on purpose'... ok i do, but i didn't realize the new 50 was THIS bad. i mean, it's funny in that 'he's retarded' kind of way but after a song or two i feel like i need to read a book. 'in the club' sounds weird now...

i bet you've seen these bat mitzvah pics of 50. fat joe... please write some funny verses about this. what rhymes with 'torah'?

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

PITCHFORK NERDS! TURN THAT FROWN UPSIDE-DOWN!



new years jam sesh at irving plaza with dr dog! i can't wait! there are only a few bands in the world that i would see on new years at a place that charges $5 for a can of bud. dr dog, superchunk circa 'slack motherfucker', and minor threat although the beer drinking would feel weird. i still would do it though

do you think nate's wearing the arm sleeve to be like A.I.?


how long until someone rocks the face guard in homage to rip? jordan's left ear ring looked weird [i get it... a 'bull']. and it looked even weirder on pippen. stockton short shorts on chris paul? shawn kemp beer belly on sean may?

this picture of nate and GP is weird. it's like they're dancing.

Monday, November 28, 2005

their venn diagram game is tight



score! i walked by the merc and they added a third explosions show! ok it blows my mind that they're gonna sell out 3 shows, but i guess what with billy bob thorton and all, they have quite a following now. the last time i saw them was a-m-a-z-i-n-g. i got 4 tickets. who wants to go with me? e-mail me!

also, while i was there i saw that shred meadow was playing with j mascis. uh, yeah! i got 2 tickets for that one too. i know there are certain jewish people with strange last names that don't like them anymore, but the show will be a stoner's paradise!

who's tired of this guy?


i respect this guy for putting in his time, but did you see sportscenter tonight? 'stupid is as stupid does'? what did he say? jabajaba whu? is he the only coach who suspended himself for telling another coach he'd 'kick his ass' and then ended up keeping his job? boo. can you imagine if sprewell said that? and not only cause spre gets a shout on the mike jones record...

please john chaney is dubious. he says more stupid things than bobby knight and T.O. combined... and with none of the humor! free T.O.!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

i've been bummed lately for sure



but alex wags' birthday was shredding. "hello my name is earl and my hobbies include eating good food with major bro's and hanging out and then going to a spot where we can hear the smiths..." irene was back! jason was being an asshole! wags was drinking weird drinks! wild dude was skanking! will was marmaduke by 2am! K danced to 'W' music! schmelling held it down! brian high-fived us on the way out! good times! ok sorry for the roll call but sometimes it's just that 'roll call' kind of moment.

so what if i ended up dancing alone to good music. i'm not mad. ok i am... haha

also, salim stoudemire fucked my head-to-head team tonight. wtf.... i dropped him for james posey. austin croshere next?

i wish i was going to miami this week...

bummer


i was too hungover to see bright eyes and the magic numbers last night. and the reports were sick! i should've gone. and then i rode my bike to get explosions tickets and both nights are sold out. and then i found out both dinosaur nights are sold out. fuckers! i guess i get to see most sweet shows but i'm pissed i'm sleeping on all these good ones. i'm pissed! at least i'll get to see dr dog on new years. hopefully...

nice photo nocito i stole it. your website is too dirty for me to look at.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WAGS!



a good game yesterday. nate made some mistakes but came up big in OT! i know everyone was talking up the 'great' one after the game, all i was thinking was how sweet A.I. has been for so long. this dude has carried the sixers for a decade! pouring in points and playing D. respect!

i never heard his raps record but i'd like to. i heard c webb's. awesome! i wonder if they would ever do a collab... nah they should stick to hoops and their million zillion dollars. my friend thom once made a poster that said 'war is not the answer' and a drawing of iverson! sick. just, sick.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

'i want pancakes now, you know!'



i can't believe big Z got later'd on 'prison break' this week. ok we all saw that coming but it was lame. that show is kinda starting to suck. but what's not sucking are these KG rumors. i'm into it!

ok it's time to starting calling fools out. busts: stromile swift, pyrzbilla, james jones, raja bell, kurt thomas [everyone on this team but nash], desmond mason, josh smith, toine, damon stoudemire, jalen rose, kyle korver and rafer. RAFEEER! [in dr doom voice] i bet i can think of more...

good starts: charlie villanueva, frye, chris paul [sick], ricky davis, salim stoudamire, sean may, dwight howard [!] the cambyman, iggy, c webb, bonzi, and the usual

ok back to work. a big happy eating-day to the 5 people who read this thing! veggie turkey anyone?

Monday, November 21, 2005

some watergate ish



"Internet rumors are full steam ahead with the KG to New York, Detroit or New Jersey takes. Joe Dumars supposedly had another individual in the franchise make the offer of Darko Milicic and Rasheed Wallace to the Wolves for KG so he could claim ignorance if asked about it. Stay tuned, as the rumors are going to get bigger and better surrounding KG"

zeke is talking to mchale about KG for a bunch of huge expiring contracts! right now it's antonio davis, penny, a 1st rounder, and someone else? i'm thinking we'll have to part with lee, nate rob, and/or probably frye but.... WE'RE TALKING THE BIG TICKET! with all this lebron, duncan, amare coverage people forget that KG is still the 2nd best PF in the league [respect to the big fundamental].

the fact that we know this info means probably it won't happen, but it's fun to think about. so the t wolves would be left with mccants, wally, frye and a really young team. who do they think they can sign with all that money? although it's pretty clear they're having trouble building around KG.

who knows. i'll believe when i see it...

OTHER LEVEL


The AC were crazy last night. i mean, i've seen them a whole bunch of times and i was all 'what can they do at this point that would be better than what they've already done?' and then they proceeded to fucken tear up webster hall! there was some serious fanning out on my and everyone else's part. they played 'banshee beat' and parts of 'grass' in two difference jams. and then they rocked a song from danse manatee. they closed with a mash up ending with... 'winter's love'! i was waiting for that all night. SHREDDDDING!

carol had stomach ails all night and josh wasn't there so those were two major bummers. next time dudes!

Saturday, November 19, 2005

how happy am i for this guy?



he's been the best player in the nba this season. 15.9, 13.6, and 3.3 blocks per. oh, 1.7 steals a game? oui! i'm bummed he never got his shine in NY, but he did hit this shot in the finals. the times ran that magazine article called 'no one wants to play with marcus' about how he didn't get along with the knicks guys cause he wasn't a bible thumper. when he was at umass he would get so home-sick it would affect his game. after weird games he would go 'i miss my mom'. RAD!

now that i'm thinking about it, spre should've taken the wolve's offer last season. now he's just sitting at home watching CSI. you gotta think some team can use him. the raps? even denver..

now that i'm thinking about it, i better get back to work!

ENOUGH


chris russo and all these WFAN callers are fucking retarded with this 'stephon marbury is responsible for the holocaust, the crusades, korean war, etc' a couple years ago it was our FANTASY to have steph back home. now his is, and all people do is shit on him. oh, 18 and 9 suuucks. trade him. him and brown are grown ass men. they are getting paid millions. ok they don't hang out at wendy's together but the get along fine on the court. steph is totally trying to change his game, he's just got a flawed team. a 2 who plays the 1. another 2 who plays the 3. and 4's and 5's who score, but can't rebound or D up. not to even mention the average age on this squad is 15!

'every team has gotten better after steph was traded' the nets drafted richard jefferson and kenyon martin. get them on the knicks, we will get swept in the finals too. the suns got amare stoudemire, joe johnson, and Q. look at their record this season. how much better is nash making that team now? what has nash or kidd ever won?

steph's got 3 years left on a huge contract. who we gonna trade him for? who'll take him? shucks we're stuck with an all-star. i just don't get all the hate. i'm emo about this! he doesn't take bad shots, he's always in the league lead in dimes. and he passes to TIM THOMAS. NAZR MOHAMMED. JAMAL CRAWFORD. TREVOR ARIZA. i'm saying. get a couple dudes half as good as amare and r jeff and all this 'marbury is a cancer' talk will go poof!

remember his katrina press conference the 'babies floating in the river' stuff? people have to shit on someone else. i nominate someone who actually sucks!

nov 19 05 big silly report


aaron mckie looks like he should lay off the cheeseburgers for a while...

Friday, November 18, 2005

shocking




me and the wags were convinced sinister was the better record. convinced! then nocito asks 5 people and they all said strap! ok schmelling changed his mind to the right side [our side], but still... ken asked me if i liked that song 'i'm a cuckoo' and when i said yes, he strait kicked me! and when nocito said yes, he went 'oh, really?' just another victim of a racialist crime.

which is more mind-expanding?



eye at passerby shredding with the hammer? i couldn't really see but the show was a lot better than when the boredoms played bowery. diego got the whole show on his MD. so 90's! there was the original super roots artwork on the wall it was amazing. the rest of the show was just ok but i don't smoke. maybe i should.

or

zaza pachulia's rise to stardom? ok people weren't really sleeping on him, 13/9/2.1 and .9 blocks a game through 8 games? and you throw out his terrible game vs sac town and it's ridiculous! last night vs damp? well, damp is a sucker, but 21 and 12! 6 offensive! could we see okur vs zaza in a junk time all-star scenario? somehow that would make me happy

Thursday, November 17, 2005

ricky davis all-star



through 8 games: 41.9 min, 19.6 points, 6 assists, 5.1 rebs, .9 3ptm [41%] and 2.5 steals. 2.5!

since his 02-03 campaign with silas and the cavs [20/6/5] if been singing this guy's praises. after a couple of so-so years in boston he's really running shit right now. of course we all remember him for shooting on his own basket to get a rebound, but i remember him for... shooting on his own basket to get a rebound! c'mon, triple doubles are sweet!

JFK situation


new footage!

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

don't trade this guy



ok he'll never be a huge rebounder or a shot-blocker, but his shot is insane! did you see the 1st half against the fakers? dude if he can draw the opposing PF out of the paint then we're in business. i am so psyched on these rooks! and ariza! chuzzill on the trade talks and let this team grow. i think we got something here!

the bomb squad gets busted



"She said Newman grabbed her by the throat, threatened to kill her and dragged her down a set of stairs by her legs."

the best poster ever- mark jackson, newman, kenny walker and trent tucker in aviation gear holding bombs under the words 'the Bomb Squad'. why can't i find that pic online? stupid interweb!

it was good!



so juelz actually showed up to the party! it was so janky! you couldn't hear the music at all and he would go 'that sample was good, trust me buy my album!'. and he did his verse from 'oh boy'. it was confusing, but it might have been the booze talking. i mean thinking. two thumbs up!

meanwhile, charlie villanueva goes off for 27/13 and for the first night in weeks i'm not on top of my fantasy! i've been following his stats all season and there he goes... in all my leagues! i was too drunk to pick him up. actually, too drunk to even look at my 'puter. it's ok at least i got to see k spaz out to bone thugz... it was weird cause he hates the 'B's' from the south a lot...

Monday, November 14, 2005

no booz no good




well, it was ugly, but the knicks beat the boozer-less, ivan drago-less, keith mcloud-less, giricek-less jazz. hey channing fye looks like he could be good! but the overall team looks suspect with all those turnovers.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

UNO!


nice victory in sac-town. 3-6 from the stripe isn't that sweet but steph held it down in the 4th. ariza's line looked good too with the 4 steals. DNP jerome james again. trade him for a bag of chips. first win in 9 years at arco... it's miller time!

ok best half all season!



57-41! the squad looks strong. even jackie butler got PT. let's not fuck this up...

WTF


KK is ruining my 'bro'back mountain' fantasy team. start hitting 3's dude! also, what's wrong with skip to my lou? somebody hit some 3's for me! hello?

brutal weekend



somehow i got to see art brut twice this weekend without every actually hearing them before. here's the report: ken took me to see them at the mercury and i thought they sucked but had moments. i was definitely hating on the clip-on-ties. then k took me to see them at the tribeca and they were actually funny. 'holy mother of christ i've seen her naked twice. TWICE!' my fave moment is when the singer introduced his guitarist and the dude played a janky solo barely good enough for a battle-of-the-bands. and the singers goes, 'AMAZING!' haha. i'm still on the fence about these guys but who cares? the person next to me told me 'they're like weird al but with better music'. what's not to like?

then they played Nation of Ulysses after the band stopped you realized how shitty music is now and how awesome it was 10 years ago. that said, am i weird for really loving the new descendants record? am i the only one who bought this thing? classic rock rules!

everyone has seen these but




they're still hilarious! look at the spilled beer on dirk's sweatshirt! i don't know what it's like to get wasted but based on these pictures maybe i should give it a shot! who knew nash would be the 'wacky-face' picture kind of guy. enjoy!

Saturday, November 12, 2005

why isn't anyone calling me back? i'm not pissed anymore! really!




i just made a 2 hour superchunk mix that is jamming so hard! people sleep on 'here's to shutting up' there are some good songs on there! also, '100 thousand fireflies' might be the best song ever i said it!

irene's holy grail is a sun-ra picture book. mine might be this inclined plane 7". cakeshop had a couple of the simple machines 7"'s but not this one. that rodan song is crazy. i used to have a crush on jenny toomey too. but when i think about it i don't know what i'd do with this record if i ever scored it. i would look at it, and put it on my pile of bills and papers. so if you have this thing and want to sell it, call me!

CHILL OUT



NYC needs to chill out! we all knew the knicks had a college team on their hands. that's what we wanted! we're 0-5 but we've lost the last three games by 2 points each game. no more of this marbury for jalen rose talk. i say we just sit back and enjoy watching nate rob chuck alley-oops to himself. i love this game!

Friday, November 11, 2005

larry get it together


dude is coaching so crappy! he had all of preseason to figure this shit out. oh well, i know all the news today is about marbury getting traded. one rumor is he's getting shipped to the wolves for wally and hassell or something. i say steph gets a raw deal in ny. before this season is was a lock for 18/8 every night. sure billups is good to but he had the wallaces and hamilton. look at what steph has to deal with. just let him play.

these are some pretty sweet moves toine

but really, where is cherokee parks?




too bad the griz aren't in vancouver anymore cause nocito could've given me a pau gasol report. his new throw-back duke stylings makes me think- where's trajen langdon? william avery was a fool for leaving early, but maggette is good. except for his lame slam dunk contest showing. elton brand's show 'good eats' is one of my faves. wtf bobby hurley and jay williams got messed up. it's a shame.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

uh...




why does cnn have this sacramento video story on its front page? i mean, everyone knows detroit's a messed up city. so the sacramento video guys showed footage of burned out buildings. tell us something we don't know! remember robocop? remember? the guy who's the father on that 70s show? 'BITCHES LEAVE!'